It is not secure

Mark J Sebastian/FlickrTrying for his romantic interest in doing things so that it will only put you in the zone "friend".Telling a girl that you always consult your ex does make it more interested in you.Ignoring it did not bring her back for you. Once it loses interest, it's over.

"You're supposed to be not to speak of other women that you want to date."

This week, Doc Love help a young reader deal with questions of confidence in the interest of his love.

Hey Doc,

I am a new reader. Let me speak briefly this nightmare that I entered.

I liked Mia, a girl I know at work. His ex cheated on her and he really poorly treated. She had no friends in the city, so I set him up with a new apartment, and she finally got away from him. She is incredibly grateful to me and completely fell in love with me. As I thought, that she was not ready for a relationship, I decided to book flights to try and forget it and go and see an ex, thinking Mia would take the flag. But a few days later, things have changed, and we started dating and got romantic. Mia is not really secure, and I was really nice for her.

Anyway, things seemed to go well. Then suddenly, Mia started raising that I went to see my example just, it is not able to obtain on the fact that I had already reserved flights and was unable to get out of their. Then it began to encounter his ex in secret (she said that it is nothing happened between them, which, I believe). It kept telling me that she was falling in love with me, but that he was too afraid to what happened to the last time between it and its e.g. I changed to be the chased the Dragonfly and as an imbecile, became super submitted to her.

MIA then separated with me. She said I should go and see my ex once again, don't forget to its subject and said I should be pleased. She added that we should stop seeing each other and that she needed to be alone. After a long debate (dumb, I know), we have closed it at made informally by saying that we could be just friends.

Question: It is evident that Mia is confused and has confidence issues, but I have a chance here, or I blow it by becoming too docile? Do you think a lack of attention from me could bring Mia? I he treated really well and gave him much attention (she said that initially drew for me). Do you think that his level of initial interest can be retrieved, or is - this too be expected after his bastard ex messed her up? I know, I play poorly, but I just did not expect to fall of Mia this evil - which I him, by the way in which.

Stewie, who does not know where to begin

HI Stewie.

Let me tell you something. When you set a woman you want now with a new apartment - or washing his car or repairing his computer - what you do is down mode "friendship" directly to the boarding gate. In other words, you are looking for to up to his level of romantic interest in doing things for it. But you are not there his plumber or mechanic or technician of his computer or real estate agent. You are there to raise his level of interest, and that's it. For you psych majors: when you act as his "helper", you are broadcasting your level of interest high, which is anti-challenge. If you make a serious mistake here as soon as the get - go.

Why you'll see your ex? Your ex is ancient history. And why you are blabbing to Mia on an ex? You are not supposed to speak for other women to date you want. I know that you thought that Mia would take the index when you have made to your ex, but your way of thinking is all wrong. Somehow you figured that him saying that you were going with an ex who lives so far that you had to fly to see her was going to Mia as you more. It is not logical. And if the Mia was a nice girl, confidence, it's a stupid move.

Discover how to win when it begins to lose interest...